Soundtrack for the ED
2012; Lippincott Williams & Wilkins; Volume: 34,; Issue: 6B, Linguagem: Inglês
10.1097/01.eem.0000415811.45458.5d
ISSN1552-3624
Autores Tópico(s)Child Therapy and Development
ResumoDr. Bruce Neely with his iPod playing the ED's Top 100 hits.I pull up to the hospital and park my car, hoping that somehow, someway this will be a quiet night. I walk through the ambulance entrance, and am quickly reminded of the first rule of the ED: You Can't Always Get What You Want. The department is Crazy, but the crew is doing a good job of Staying Alive. I pass my partner coming out of Room 4, and with a depressed look, he shrugs and says, “Another One Bites the Dust” while sadly shaking his head. The charge nurse can see the look of disappointment on my face from the chaos, and she just smiles and tells me, “Here's a Quarter (Call Someone Who Ca-res). Now go get to work.” The night is just beginning, but I have the feeling that by the end of it all, I'll be in need of Lawyers, Guns & Money. I grab the first chart in the rack, and jump on the Crazy Train, hoping it isn't a Highway to Hell. I stop to share a quick word with the doctor go-ing off duty when the charge nurse nudges me, and says “You Talk Too Much. Get a move on. People are waiting.” The first patient of the night defi-nitely went Ten Rounds with Jose Cuervo and some other assorted Friends in Low Places, and is now a Shattered mess on a gur-ney in the hall. I quickly order the CT scans, and move on to Room 19 where the patient tells me, “I Want a New Drug because that one my doc gave me just doesn't work for me.” I try to reassure him that I'll do what I can, and I set about writing some prescriptions. The night gets busier because Saturday Night's Alright For Fighting, and the two guys in Room 22 are yelling, “Hit Me With Your Best Shot” at each other as I walk into the room and try to calm things down. I smile to myself that I Won't Get Fooled Again into thinking I'll ever have a calm shift. Both of them are high on Cocaine, and I can tell it's going to be a Wild Night. Finally, I try to Get Over It, and get a chance to sit down and do some charting, but as soon as my pen touches the paper, the charge nurse is tapping me on the shoulder. “Whataya Want From Me?” I snap. “Get on over to Room 4,” she says. “Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer, and she looks pretty beat up.” I get her patched up and hope her next trip to Margaritaville is less eventful. “Maybe by 3 AM I can sit down and get a snack,” I think to my-self while I try to sort out what Disease the lady in Room 9 has. Back to Room 1, where I try to calm down the elderly gentleman with chest pain by telling him, “Breathe,” while he tells me the history of his Achy Breaky Heart. I can tell he's Unwell, but he's just not making any sense, and I finally resort to asking him to Show Me What I'm Look-ing For. Now there's a commotion in the ambulance bay. “Janie's Got a Gun,” I hear someone shout. It looks like she's trying to climb a Stairway to Heaven, but by the time she is disarmed and restrained, she tells me, “I Wanna Be Sedated and become Comfortably Numb.” For the time being, the Hysteria has calmed down, and the charge nurse just smiles and tells me, “Welcome to the Jun-gle.” “I'm sorry, sir,” I tell the patient in Room 3. “You Be ‘Illin if you have One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer when you have a bad case of Vertigo.” He looks a bit less green around the gills after some IV fluids and meds, and I move on to the next room. “Just because I used my month's supply of Oxy in two weeks doesn't mean I'm Addicted,” the young woman says as she tries to convince me to give her some more. I think to myself at least she's Alive and Kicking, unlike so many others. “Baby, Hold On,” her boyfriend tells her. “I'll just give you some of my Oxy, and you'll be fine.” With that, I turn and leave to see what's next. “Hey, our every Saturday night visit from Kenneth hasn't happened yet,” I think to myself, but as soon as I do, that thought is replaced by “What Was I Thinking?” Thank God and Greyhound, he's off to see his family on the East Coast, and is someone else's problem now. Then it's off to Room 20 where the unfortunate newlywed was Lookin' For Love when his new wife came in and found him with another woman. Now he has Two Tickets to Para-dise, no one to use them with, and his Bad Day just keeps getting worse when I explain all the shots and pills he is going to need to take. Back down the hall to Room 4 where a hospice patient is Knockin' on Heaven's Door. I know that I'm supposed to be The Fixer, and I don't think I'll be able to fix this one, but I encourage him to Just Breathe. The looks on the faces of his family shows me they know what is coming and (Don't Fear) The Reaper. As he quietly passes, all I can do is whisper, “Goodbye To You,” shake the hands of his family, and walk back out into the land of the living. The borderline patient in Room 5 is now screaming that it “Hurts So Good,” and I think to myself, “It's Five O'clock Somewhere,” and wish it were 5:00 here because then my shift would be just about over. Alas, it's back to the Super Freak with multiple Cuts Like a Knife on her arms. On closer inspection, it turns out that The First Cut is the Deepest, but the others are more superficial and I'll be done with the staples in no time. My trip into the Twilight Zone continues when from across the hall I hear the cries of “Doctor, My Eyes. Can't I have a shot of Di-laudid?” I kindly tell him I'm not Dr. Feelgood, and will get him some anesthetic drops that should help. “Don't Go Breaking My Heart, Doc. I really need that Di-laudid!” he replies. I again politely refuse, but I swear he's following me down the hall as I walk away. He's not; I'm just tired and feeling Paranoid, and I remind myself, “Don't Stop (Thinking About Tomorrow)” and the short vacation I have planned. The psych patients are really starting to stack up now. “Don't Lie,” I hear myself say to one who's Tied Down to a cart in the hall. “Honest, Doc, I Shot the Sheriff,” he screams to no one in particular. That's what Livin' on the Edge is all about, I guess. I have Hope that this Saturday won't become Sunday Bloody Sunday when at Twenty-Five to Midnight, a college student who has had too much Red, Red Wine gushingly tells me, “Someone Saved My Life Tonight,” and plants a drunken kiss on the stunned EMT who has just helped her off the gurney. The EMT just smiles like a Smooth Opera-tor, and brushes off the unrequested adoration. By this time, I'm thinking I'll Go Crazy if I Don't Go Crazy Tonight. I'm just about Out of Body, Out of Mind and My Give a Damn's Busted when the family who lost the hospice patient thanks me for taking such good care of their dad. “Thanks to You and Your Heart. You've given me back some of my sanity,” I tell them and wish them well as they leave. Over in Room 6, the patient tells me, “I'm Pretty Good at Drinking Beer, but I had One Little Slip, and now I think my ankle is busted.” Turns out he's right, but he's in better shape than the lady across the hall that's had a Little Drop of Poison. “I know it was Stupid, but Something's Always Wrong,” she tells me. “I promise I won't ever do it again. Can't I please go home now?” “Not before we make sure that everything is going to be OK,” I say, and head off to the critical care room. When I arrive, the nurses have started pressors, and the patient is liv-ing Life by the Drop. Thanks to quick-thinking nurses and some of life's Little Wonders, it looks like he is going to pull through and make it upstairs to the ICU. Here comes the charge nurse again, heading down the hall to Give Me the Melt-down. “There's Gunpowder & Lead from a Saturday Night Special in Trauma 1, and a guy who looks like he's been attacked by Mack the Knife in Trauma 2,” she reports. “Carry On Wayward Son,” she says with a wink and a pat on the shoulder as I trudge off to see the new arrivals. The police are giving the Authority Song to the gunshot victim, and he just looks at me and asks, “Am I going make it?” “Have a Little Faith in Me,” I reassure him. “It doesn't look too bad. I think you will be OK.” Another ambulance full of Fruitcakes pulls up, but I'm ready for Anything Anytime Anywhere, and it's clear I Ain't Goin Down ('Til the Sun Comes Up) because I'm the one on duty, and I know How to Save a Life. Sometimes when Everybody's Bro-ken, all you can do is shoot them full of Novocaine, and tell them to Have a Nice Day as they head for the door. One more case of The Needle and the Damage Done, and I'm afraid the charge nurse is going to tell me to “Take This Job and Shove It,” but then day breaks, and Help arrives in the form of my well rested colleague. I finish up my last few charts and head back out the door with thoughts of home and a nice long nap, hoping I won't end up in a Car Crash and have to come right back. The ED Top 100 Soundtrack You Can't Always Get What You Want, The Rolling Stones Crazy, Patsy Cline Staying Alive, Bee Gees Another One Bites the Dust, Queen Here's a Quarter (Call Someone Who Cares), Travis Tritt Lawyers, Guns & Money, Warren Zevon Crazy Train, Ozzy Osborne Highway to Hell, AC/DC You Talk Too Much, Run-D.M.C. Ten Rounds with Jose Cuervo, Tracy Byrd Friends in Low Places, Garth Brooks Shattered, O.A.R. I Want a New Drug, Huey Lewis & the News Saturday Night's Alright for Fighting, Elton John Hit Me with Your Best Shot, Pat Benatar Won't Get Fooled Again, The Who Cocaine, Eric Clapton Wild Night, Van Morrison Get Over It, The Eagles Whataya Want from Me, Adam Lambert Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer, Dr. Elmo Margaritaville, Jimmy Buffet 3 AM, Matchbox Twenty Disease, Matchbox Twenty Breathe, Ryan Star Achy Breaky Heart, Billy Ray Cyrus Unwell, Matchbox Twenty Show Me What I'm Looking For, Carolina Liar Janie's Got a Gun, Aerosmith Stairway to Heaven, Led Zeppelin I Wanna Be Sedated, The Ramones Comfortably Numb, Pink Floyd Hysteria, Def Leppard Welcome to the Jungle, Guns N' Roses You Be Illin', Run-D.M.C. One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer, George Thorogood Vertigo, U2 Addicted, Kelly Clarkson Alive and Kicking, Simple Minds Baby, Hold On, Dixie Chicks What Was I Thinking?, Dierks Bentley Thank God and Greyhound (You're Gone), Roy Clark Lookin' for Love (In All the Wrong Places), Johnny Lee Two Tickets to Paradise, Eddie Money Bad Day, Daniel Powter Knockin' on Heaven's Door, Eric Clapton The Fixer, Pearl Jam Just Breathe, Pearl Jam (Don't Fear) The Reaper, Blue Oyster Cult Goodbye to You, Patty Smyth Hurts So Good, John Cougar It's Five O'clock Somewhere, Alan Jackson Super Freak, Rick James Cuts Like a Knife, Bryan Adams The First Cut is the Deepest, Cheryl Crow Twilight Zone, Golden Earring Doctor, My Eyes, Jackson Browne Dr. Feelgood, Motley Crue Don't Go Breaking My Heart, Elton John and Kiki Dee Paranoid, Black Sabbath Don't Stop (Thinking about Tomorrow), Fleetwood Mac Don't Lie, Black Eyed Peas Tied Down, Colbie Caillat I Shot the Sheriff, Bob Marley/Eric Clapton Livin' on the Edge, Aerosmith Hope, Jack Johnson Sunday Bloody Sunday, U2 Twenty-Five to Midnight, Sting Red, Red Wine, UB40 Someone Saved My Life Tonight, Elton John Smooth Operator, Sade I'll Go Crazy if I Don't Go Crazy Tonight, U2 Out of Body, Out of Mind, Smokin' Joe Kubek My Give a Damn's Busted, Jo Dee Messina You and Your Heart, Jack Johnson Pretty Good at Drinkin' Beer, Billy Currington One Little Slip, Barenaked Ladies Little Drop of Poison, Tom Waits Stupid, Toad the Wet Sprocket Something's Always Wrong, Toad the Wet Sprocket Life by the Drop, Stevie Ray Vaughn & Double Trouble Little Wonders, Rob Thomas Give Me the Meltdown, Rob Thomas Gunpowder & Lead, Miranda Lambert Saturday Night Special, Lynyrd Skynyrd Mack the Knife, Louis Armstrong Carry On Wayward Son, Kansas Authority Song, John Mellencamp Have a Little Faith in Me, John Hiatt Fruitcakes, Jimmy Buffett Anything Anytime Anywhere, Jimmy Buffett Ain't Goin' Down ('Til the Sun Comes Up), Garth Brooks How to Save a Life, The Fray Everybody's Broken, Bon Jovi Novocaine, Bon Jovi Have a Nice Day, Bon Jovi The Needle and the Damage Done, Neil Young Take This Job and Shove It, Johnny Paycheck Help, The Beatles Car Crash, Matt Nathanson
Referência(s)